Initial Reflection Try to role-play the following scenario in your mind – and to touch base with yourself, with the help of the questions posed after each one.

Outside the Door

Picture yourself in the following scenario:

After working at your job for a year, you feel it is time for a salary raise. You have not had much interaction with your boss on such issues – but you know that he is not known for his generosity, and you don’t know how he will react. You’ve decided to discuss the issue with your boss, and have emailed him asking if you can talk. A minute ago, you received an email from him telling you to come to his office. You walk down the hall and are right outside his door. Before you knock, ask yourself: How do you feel? What thoughts are in your mind – and what physical reactions are you feeling (good starting points would be to consider your stomach and your pulse)?

The Night Before

Picture yourself in the following scenario:

Your car has broken down again. You know that there’s no way around it this time - you need to buy a new one. Going over your finances tonight, you calculate that while you have a little money set aside for this, it is not much. You know that with your budget, the difference between getting a decent car, and a car that will only bring you grief, will depend upon your ability to negotiate well with the salesperson at the used car lot you will go to tomorrow morning. You are now lying in bed, picturing tomorrow’s interaction.

Ask yourself: What pictures are going through your mind? How do they make you feel? Try to name any emotions you are experiencing: Stress? Anticipation? Enthusiasm? Antagonism? A desire to curl up even deeper under the blanket? If you, or the car salesperson, have said anything to each other in the exchanges you’ve simulated in your mind – what was the nature of your tone? Of your words? Friendly banter? Fighting words?